Now Maserati Rock Ice

Ok, so you’re about to bin your Corolla, you can’t get an extension to your mortgage to build that third bedroom you so desperately need, and you’re working out how your favourite Premiership side is going to last the season without diving headfirst into administration.

Never mind! Not to worry! Maserati have just licensed a new line of luxury jewelry!

Supercar brands have never given succor to the financial concerns of the rank-and file of the Great British public, but Maser’s new move into diamonds with luxury Italian jeweler Diamani goes one step beyond the pale.

Revhead model Jodie Kidd was there at Mayfair’s Connaught Hotel as she usually is, all seven foot eight of her – as well as singer Paloma Faith (below) and, Brummie-raver-turned-US-TV-superstar Cat Deeley.

We at Influx towers of course will take the opportunity to share this piece of earth-shattering news with you (and to run some nice press pictures of the gorgeous Gran Cabrio, set off nicely by Jodie’s exquisite line, bespangled by the Diamani rocks that, undoubtedly look lovely too).

But we can’t help thinking that, say, a SsangYong tie-in with a brand of tinned spam would be more suited to the times?  An Albert Steptoe look alike would be the perfect brand rep for the deal, and maybe Rising Damp’s Mr Rigsby could do standup at the launch party.

Oh well. We suppose those Merchant Bankers need something on which to spend their bonuses .